Then every one deserted him and fled. Mark 14:50
…then all the disciples deserted him and fled. Matthew 26:56
In our times of frustration or disappointment or anger brought on by the difficult life our child must lead, we find seasons in which our passion for God wanes. We get angry about the plans we must cast aside. We grieve over shattered dreams. We long for a day in which our disabled child would be like other kids and we like other parents.
We feel abandoned by God, isolated, even forgotten. In such seasons, we begin to doubt him. We look to the future with fear. We forget the plans he has mapped out for us. We run up a flag of surrender and we give in to our fears, our worries, and our frustrations. Then, we flee.
Once we have done so and we come to see that our of clay and an angry heart have led us off into the shadows and the empty corners of life, we must make up our minds to return. We do so by realizing all are broken and fall short (Romans 3:23) and all have fled Christ or denied him or turned deaf ears to his call.
We all have seen our courage turn to cowardice.
We all have worn the label deserter. Even Peter — who later became a miracle man capable of healing others with just a shadow — fled. Even John — the beloved — who was given a glimpse into Heaven so that he might helps us prepare for the future, fled. To find our way back, we need only take stock of the situation. We need only to follow their example of taking hold of the risen Christ and letting him lead them into the places he needed them to go. Since we still breathe this air, we must realize God is not finished with us. There still exists a plan for our lives. There still exists a ministry into which we are called. There still exists unimagined blessings of which we are to partake.
We should remember both the sainted successes of those like Peter and John and others, as well as their own struggles with being human, with falling short, with deserting Christ. For all of us, the true glory of God is reflected not in the notion that we never doubted, never fled, never stayed away, but in our willing and ready return.
